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    <lastmod>2022-02-18</lastmod>
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      <image:caption>Dan in his natural habitat: wearing a cardigan.</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2022-07-11</lastmod>
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    <lastmod>2022-02-12</lastmod>
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      <image:title>Podcast - The Flop House</image:title>
      <image:caption>Back in September of 2007, I thought “I need a podcast.” Over the 15 years since, that podcast has become beloved and successful enough to join the Max Fun network, become profitable, and allow us to tour with the show across the U.S. and Canada — probably because I had the good fortune to have my thought a few years before everyone else in the world also thought “I need a podcast.” The premise? We watch a bad movie, then talk about it. My co-hosts are my friends Elliott Kalan (a comedy writer from The Daily Show, MST3K, Housebroken, and more) and Stuart Wellington (a bartender and co-owner of Hinterlands and Minnie’s Bar in Brooklyn). It really helps our success that they’re funnier than me. If you’re a lover of bad movies, and the comedy they bring, then maybe our show is for you. Maybe start with a fan-favorite episode, like Cats, Foodfight!, Bullet to the Head, Fateful Findings, A Talking Cat?!?, Bratz, or The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure. Or you could start with a bigger movie you’re likely to have seen, like The Rise of Skywalker, Zack Snyder’s Justice League, or Suicide Squad. Or perhaps it’s notable guests you crave. If so, you could sample an episode with Jamelle Bouie, Joel Hodgson, Barbara Crampton, Joe Bob Briggs, Justin McElroy, Felicia Day, Roman Mars, Wyatt Cenac, John Hodgman, Gillian Flynn, Jessica Williams, or Chris Weitz! If you love the show, you can support it by becoming a member of Maximum Fun, so that we can afford to keep making them. If you hate the show, please don’t do anything. You’re fine right where you are.</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2022-02-12</lastmod>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/620696c0f9da4e19e5df092e/cc81f542-c87d-418c-a105-26fd4fe01777/Screen+Shot+2022-02-11+at+2.26.42+PM.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>TV Writing - Jon was interested in covering a news story about how NYC and Chicago were locked in a battle over which had the tallest skyscraper. When writing my headline, I took a risk and only briefly touched on the building aspect before hijacking the segment for a roast of my home state of Illinois and “Chicago-style“ pizza. Fortunately, Jon loved it, and asked me and fellow writer Daniel Radosh to bulk up the pizza rant even more! If you’ve seen and remember something I’ve written, it’s probably this.</image:title>
      <image:caption>THE DAILY SHOW WITH JON STEWART, 11/13/2013</image:caption>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/620696c0f9da4e19e5df092e/1cc0db48-a096-4d6c-8757-9d2b16dc4214/Screen+Shot+2022-02-11+at+2.32.30+PM.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>TV Writing - On another occasion, China’s lunar rover was in the news for the oddly poetic “final messages” it was broadcasting home as its power died. I thought it would be funny to have the rover’s messages dramatically read by Sir Patrick Stewart, so I took another chance and wrote him into the script (this was a less nutty swing than it may seem, since I knew that he lived in Brooklyn and liked the show). I was thrilled to learn that the bosses went for it, as did P-Stew. Seeing that lion of the British stage standing around in cardboard covered in foil really gave me a fuzzy “What have I done? Why am I wasting this poor man’s time?” feeling. I’m truly sorry, Sir Pat.</image:title>
      <image:caption>THE DAILY SHOW WITH JON STEWART, 02/04/2014</image:caption>
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      <image:loc>https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/620696c0f9da4e19e5df092e/729af463-e35c-43ff-bd7c-68b4a6dad1fa/Screen+Shot+2022-02-11+at+2.43.22+PM.png</image:loc>
      <image:title>TV Writing - Towards the end of Jon’s time at TDS, I got assigned a story on the implications of a trade partnership with Pacific Rim countries. Naturally, I used it as an excuse to make Jon say “Pacific Rim jobs” a lot. Then, when he was “confused” by the audience’s giggles, I also wrote in a walk-on for myself, where I explained both the concept of analingus, and the meaning of “double entendre.” It was always kind of an unspoken rule that — while writers would occasionally appear on the show in various small roles— you shouldn’t write in cameos for yourself. So when Jon approved the script, his first note was, “Love it. Gonna do it… Maybe without the McCoy walk-on.” Then, remembering his own dont-give-a-fuck senioritis, he reconsidered. “Or maybe with it! Who cares?! I got five weeks left, baby!” The walk-on stayed in.</image:title>
      <image:caption>THE DAILY SHOW WITH JON STEWART, 06/17/2015</image:caption>
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      <image:title>TV Writing - During my last 4 - 5 years at The Daily Show, I became the go-to writer for Lewis Black’s “Back in Black” segments. What can I say? I guess I’m a good fit for writing grumpy old men. This one (co-written with Zach DiLanzo) was maybe my favorite, really gleefully making fun of Donald Trump’s two-bit inauguration plans.</image:title>
      <image:caption>THE DAILY SHOW WITH TREVOR NOAH, 01/17/2017</image:caption>
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    <lastmod>2025-05-13</lastmod>
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